It's been awhile

Or, a tale of small buckets.

My, ambition is a sneaky thing.

We want to do all of the things.

I want to do all of the things.

But I can’t.

Last month I read 4,000 Weeks by Oliver Burkeman. I was looking for another time management book like the rest, but instead found an alternate philosophy on time management — namely, that this too is a vanity and striving after the wind. The simple fact that there are an infinite number of choices available to us means anything we do removes our ability to do anything else at that time. Multitasking notwithstanding, we are finite beings. The fear of missing out is erroneous because it is a decision — whether conscious or not — to exclude all other choices at that moment. Like the tuner of a radio, it works not by selecting one particular frequency, but by removing all other frequencies from the speaker. Focus is, by nature, an exclusionary act.

I thought I would update this Substack more frequently. But instead I have turned my attention to the serial novel with devoted fervor. And on top of that, I’ve started a BookTube channel. These are all efforts to find people who like the sort of books I like. On Substack, on Twitter/X, and on writing forums, all I find are other writers trying to market their books to other writers. I want to be where the readers are. Hawking my books won’t get me very far if they’re aimed at other people doing the same with their own scribbled writings. So my thoughts of late have been to continue writing my own story to the best of my ability, while slowly gathering together people interested in the same books as myself via the YouTube channel — and eventually converting some of them into people who would like to read the sort of books I write.

All the while being aware that I have a very small bucket. By which I mean: I cannot do very many things at one time. Whether or not we’re looking at it through the Oliver Burkeman lens, I’ve noticed that as I approach another plateau of life, I can’t handle more than one social media network at a time. I can’t devote myself to more than one social circle at a time. And my creative pursuits, stifled by job and family obligations, must be selective.

And yet throughout all this, this website — for what it is — should not be as neglected as it has been, nor should its readers. More should be posted here than just the hawking of books, on which I am somehow in 10th or 12th place. This small bucket must pour more of me out into the world. I’ll try to figure it out.

For now, this update will have to suffice. Happy 2026 to all. May your buckets never run dry, and your tuner never drift.